Consequently, I don’t need to listen to yours. Get your fucking stereo faggotry out of your window, you fucking teenage, unemployed, virgin, mongoloid, Dominican, needle-dicked cuntrag. For fuck’s sake.
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I already have a radio.
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Jan 1 1:47 AM
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If this is yours, then have I got some STDs for you!
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Dec 24 1:00 AM
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Adding “fuckyeah” in front of shit is fucking TEH GHEY, you enormous fucking douche.
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As in: “fuckyeahimahipsterfromawealthyconnecticutfamilywhojustdiscoveredmemeslolwut.” Fucking lemming.
Dec 24 12:39 AM
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If you banged some other guy and then lied to your spouse about who the father was
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and then he finds out through DNA testing that “his” child isn’t “his,” divorces you and you get together with the biological dad, then the guy who spent all those years raising your kid gets to stop paying child support you frigid rusty twat. Yeah, I’m talking to you, Stephanie.
Dec 23 3:30 PM
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You definitely don’t have a complex about your penis size
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if you happen to be the kind of cop who, say, finds driving a Hummer so insufficiently overcompensating that he has to make up for the missing inches waving his Glock 9mm around at a few dozen civilians having a snowball fight. Nope. No castration anxiety issues there.
Dec 22 2:57 PM
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Your bag doesn’t qualify for its own seat on a crowded subway train.
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I know, life’s not fair. Still, you should probably just go and die somewhere you inconsiderate anorexic hipster piece of shit.
Dec 21 9:57 PM
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If you’re Dominican and you live in Washington Heights
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then it’s probably always a good time to burn your entire CD collection. With fire.
Dec 20 11:51 PM
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If you’re driving a snowplow
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and there’s no snow on the road, it’s probably safe to LIFT THE FUCKING PLOW UP. Jesus, is the cab of your truck soundproofed or something? Can you not hear just how fucking loud that is? Fuck.
Dec 20 11:37 PM
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(photo)
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You probably should’ve stuck with your original plan to get “once you go black, you never go back” done in Asian characters, champ.
Dec 12 8:04 PM
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(audio)
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Dec 12 6:54 PM
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Repeatedly revving your very noisy engine
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and proceeding to do 80mph down my empty block after 10pm in your shitty, pimped-out, two-tone Honda, setting off car alarms the whole way, doesn’t mean you’re “the shit.” It just means you enjoy having copious amounts of unprotected sex with other men before returning to the comfort of your “beard.” And frankly, just buying a megaphone, walking out on my block and shouting that to the whole world would be a hell of a lot easier, not to mention potentially liberating (for you, that is), than the whole overcompensating, quasi-symbolic “Durr, look-at-me, my-car-has-a-gas-peddle-too” shtick. Dickwhistle.
Dec 12 6:15 PM
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If you’re the owner of “guesswhat.tumblr.com” or “heyguesswhat.tumblr.com,”
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you should probably either use the domain or give up the name. Or kill yourself. Or, you know, both. Some of us sarcastic assholes would like a shorter site name, you inconsiderate fuck(s).
Dec 12 6:05 PM
